How to stop premature ejaculation with visualization.
Visualization is a hot topic at the moment but how can it help you stop premature ejaculation?
Visualization can train your mind and your body to connect and control your actions because it sets your habit mind in motion. Getting into a good habit and dropping the negative habit (because you don’t do it anymore)!
Premature ejaculation has many origins but one of the most important factors is becoming aware and slowing your body down. Visualization is just one part of the small jigsaw puzzle which fits with, breathwork, PC muscle exercise and practices like Qi Gong and Tai Chi which promote the mind body connection.
Sportsmen have used this tool for years – watch any player taking a penalty, lining up a golf shot – they take a deep breath- visualize where and how to hit the ball and then they do it because visualization combined with training has formed the habit of hitting the ball plus the incentive to be good enough to play (with the team) and enjoy it!
So everyday for 10 minutes relax breathe deeply (video here https://www.renaissancevitality.com/about.html ) Visualize yourself with your lover, take time to imagine the feel of her hair, the softness of her lips, the roundness of her body. Remember you have all the time in the world to make love, imagine the place- in the garden, in a cosy bedroom by the fire, a relaxing safe space where no one can disturb you, it’s your personal vision. Imagine her touching you and kissing intimately, the weight of her body upon yours- remember this is your imagination and it’s a visualization not a fantasy, it’s the visualization of you making love to her for as long as you want –slowly, taking your time no rush.
Do this everyday for at least 21-28 days that’s how long it takes for the brain to form new neural pathways of positive change. Make a promise to insight change now! Because you deserve the sex you want and to share it.
What is sexual healing?
There are several unique facets of the Sexual Healing process which is the integration of your mind and body.
When you practice correct diaphragmatic breathwork it roots you in the present moment- the anxiety of negative experiences has no room in the mind, you breathe oxygen into your body which enables your heart, lungs, kidneys to power blood flow into your genital area.
You come from a place of love not only for other people and also making love is not just for sharing with our lover but the practices of self care is the basis of self love.
Many people are often in a loop of negativity when you are plagued by the past which prevents you being totally in your body during sex/love-making.
If we have encountered a negative experience of sex which can range from abuse or just harsh words from friends in the locker room or an unthinking lover, our parents negativity of sexual love or a feeling of shame or inadequacy of our body – all these and more are all negative feelings that haunt us. Often it’s a loop our own mind has created that is based on a sentence spoken by another who has never even realized the impact of those words - or the words have been misconstrued and just play over in our mind.
If we experienced sex when it wasn’t part of an equal and loving union then so many negative emotions can rise up, the feeling of violation, when permission wasn't sought nor given.
Yet the fact is - it wasn’t our fault, we hadn’t given our permission or we were a victim of something that we didn’t understand at the time. This is where the mind and body can become disconnected because your mind shuts down - your body stiffens and tightens with the memories of sex with no emotional connection or love brings these difficult feelings to the surface.
When a caring heart centred space is held for you, you can heal those painful memories and create memories of joy and pleasure and this is what our body was made for, to receive loving bliss and to give this to those we feel a heart connection to.
You can heal. You can begin another chapter in your life because you can replace the pain of the past with beautiful memories of what sexuality should be, a loving, life affirming experience of powerful bliss which releases every feel good chemical in your body in a safe environment.
Talk therapy can never erase the cellular memory of a negative experience, you have to replace this with a lived through positive experience and learn new ways of perceiving your amazing body. A body that automatically tenses when sexual feelings rise needs to shown a way through the barrier and relax into pleasure through caring, honouring touch.
You may have no sense of this tension, this is often the case when men get caught up in a circle of anxiety which leads to Premature Ejaculation or Erectile Dysfunction. The tension blocks the sexual energy or the awareness of the reflex of ejaculation is disconnected, the mind is over-thinking or replaying a negative scenario or the subconscious has formed a habit which becomes unconscious.
You can heal, there is a natural way and only you can be the catalyst of change.
Tara le mains Author
Hello. I've been studying sexual well being and trained as a Naturopathic Sexologist and Holistic Sexual Therapist with some of the most eminent natural sexual energy masters as well as energy healing, energy medicine, meditation, mindfulness, Qi Gong and yoga for over 25 years. I've received training from some of the renown Masters in these fields such as Mantak Chia. I have a Degree in Naturopathic Sexology. I'm Certified by Breathworks UK and The British Mindfulness Institute. My passion is seeing the change in my students as a session is about learning and knowing yourself, this energy is within all of us, when you feel nurtured, the whole of you feels alive, I awaken that vitality and enable you find your positive charge.